Left Out

Feeling left out is the worst. I think it starts out young. Being left out on the playground in elementary school, someone not including you in their group in middle school, not being invited to party in high school. Even as an adult I get hurt when someone leaves me out of their plans that I feel like I should be included on.

This whole infertility things brings about a whole new mess of feeling left out. I know that I am all in my head (and I’m really working on that) but when you are one of the only ones who hasn’t been invited join in on the baby parade, it starts to get really really lonely. I get it, you want to spend time with the people who are in the same life stages as you. But I have to tell you, I am starting to feel REALLY left out. I want to be able to have conversations with my friends about the stages that our kids are in, compare stories, be able to have something in common again.

I am so lucky that I have been able to meet people that are going through the same infertility struggles as me, but if I’m being honest I will be so glad to move on. I don’t want to be left out anymore. I want to be a little bit normal. I want to blend in with the crowd. I don’t want to have any more awkward conversations about not having children.

But until then, we just keep moving forward.

The Lord hears those who cry out, and he delivers them from all of their distress. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and he delivers those whose spirit has been crushed. Psalm 34:17-18

xoxo
HP

 

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Goodbye September…

Well, we’ve almost made it through our most favorite month of all 🙂 We wrapped up September this past weekend with CPs birthday, and I must say, it was a pretty great weekend!!!

I love his birthday almost as much as I love my own. I love showering him with gifts, and parties and surprises!

We began his birthday celebration on Thursday night with a little happy hour, then headed to Alamo Drafthouse for a 90s sing a long. If you have a Alamo Drafthouse close by, go and do this sing a long. It was such a blast! But only go if you like to have fun…if you are a fun hater than you won’t enjoy it.

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Then Friday night was family dinner night with CP’s family! Pizza, card games and ice cream…all of his favorite things 🙂

Saturday was his actual birthday, and it just happened to fall on the same day as one of the biggest games of the season. So we did want any good little red raider would do, we threw a big tailgate in his honor!! My brother and sister in law came in town to play, so we loaded up at 10:45 and headed to brunch!! $3 mimosas are just what the doctor ordered 🙂

After brunch we headed over to the stadium for a day full of friends, games and cold beer! Perfect!

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Although Tech lost (a devastating loss might I add), it was an incredible game and we are freaking proud of our raiders!

CP,
I hope you had the most amazing birthday! I am so happy you were born! Love you more!!

We shall prepare for it all over again this weekend when we head to Dallas for the Rangers game, and the Tech/Baylor game. I just love the fall 🙂

I hope everyone has a great Monday!!!!

xoxo
HP

31 reasons to be Thankful…

Wowzas, it’s been a while guys. I do apologize! I’ve been one busy little bee. I have missed you guys though.

Yesterday I celebrated my 31st birthday. I honestly cannot believe that I am 31 years old, because I feel like I’m about 23. Age is just a number, am I right?

I have the best husband who always makes sure I have the BEST birthdays. We went to my parents house over the weekend for a little family birthday cookout and some football watching (HOW ABOUT THEM RED RAIDERS). Yesterday morning (my actual bday) I woke up to the most BEAUTIFUL tennis bracelet to match my wedding ring. I know guys, I am a lucky girl. The good news about turning 31 is you get to wear fancy jewelry!! Then last night we went out to dinner with my favorite people to one of our favorite places! I ended my perfect day with a long bubble bath! Perfection!

I wanted to take some time to reflect on the past year. I have to be honest, it’s been the hardest year of my life. A lot of sadness, a ton of disappointment. But guys, we made it through. I found this quote yesterday and I felt like it defined my year perfectly.

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Year 31 for me is a year of hope and possibility. I don’t know where God is leading me or what He is doing, but I do know that I can make through anything with His grace and perfect love. His plans are way better than mine, He’s proved it time and time again.

Well guys, I hope you have an excellent Tuesday!!

xoxo
HP

Back At It…

Hi Guys!! Wow…I have really been slacking on my blog lately!! We had such a great weekend at the lake for the holiday weekend! I love the 4th of July!! Food, family, fireworks…can’t be it!!

I believe that it’s time for another brutally honest post.

I think the reason that I have been absent is because I thought I was pregnant. Seriously, a miracle pregnancy. I had so many early pregnancy symptoms. I am not even kidding, I felt it. I felt pregnant. I was to the point where I was looking up when my due date would be. I thought we would be one of those couples who could tell the funny story, “we went to our first fertility appointment and then got pregnant naturally.”

Well, I am not. You would think that it would make it a little easier knowing that we are already working towards our baby. We have already started all of the testing and taking all the right steps. It’s not easier. I am angrier this time than I have been. My faith is shaky right now.

Would you guys pray for me? I need my positive attitude back. I would like to have some sort of normalcy back in my life, not worrying or thinking about my fertility all the time.

I hope everyone has a great week 🙂

xoxo
HP

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You Can Do Hard Things

Featured imageThis seems to be all I can get out today. It’s a tough one. Just trying to prepare my mind, and my heart for my big appointment next Tuesday. The appointment that I am absolutely terrified to go to. Asking for prayers today 🙂 Prayers for comfort, and joy, and strength, and the peace that passes understanding.

 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6-7 

xoxo
HP

Dancing in the Rain…

Guys,
did you know that people get pregnant without even trying? I know this is not a new development…but this week for some reason I keep thinking about it. No tracking, no doctors, no medication, it just happens. I can’t even begin to imagine what that feels like. To be surprised to get pregnant. Not having to go every month wondering, agonizing, bargaining, praying, crying. If only that could happen to us. Wouldn’t that be incredible?

Sometimes our journey in life just has to be different than others. Right now, I just don’t know why. I trust with my whole heart that it will be so worth it, because everything in my life that I have had to wait for has been more incredible than I ever imagined.

It has literally been raining cats and dogs here in Texas, and it is such a blessing. Our world has been so dry down here for the past few years. Everything is growing, and turning so green! Even though the skies are grey, I know that the sun will come out soon and we can rejoice over what the rains have provided.

God, thank you for the rain you have sent to our world, and to our lives. Help us find joy when the skies are grey, and teach us to dance in the rain. Because we know, God, that the sun will come out again. Amen.

xoxo
HP

“For I will pour out water to quench your thirst and to irrigate your parched fields. And I will pour out my Spirit on your descendants, and my blessings on your children” Isaiah 44:3

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T.G.I.F

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I don’t think I’ve been this ready for Friday in a long time. Probably because I haven’t worked a full week in a long time. This real world thing is torture.

Since the hubs and I are new homeowners, we have a few projects in the works. Nothing major, our bathroom has some beautiful wallpaper that needs to be peeled and our kitchen has a lovely border that I believe has bees, birdhouses and a Christmas tree on it. Gotta love the late 90’s.

We had high hopes of tackling the kitchen this weekend. Peeling that border and putting a fresh coat of paint on the walls. But the closer is gets to the weekend, the more I just want to binge watch Parenthood on Netflix for two days. I’ll keep you posted on what we decided to do on Monday.

(btw, just started Parenthood. If you’ve never watched it, stop what you are doing and start it. Seriously one of the best shows every created)

Before I tackle this Friday and get the weekend started, I just wanted to leave you with a some inspiration I received during my quiet time this morning. I am doing a daily devotion, and today’s word was perseverance. One of the verses I ready was Romans 5:3-4.
And not only this, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. 

Have a fabulous weekend everyone!!!

xoxo HP

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